Carolyn Harris MP is the Chair of the All-Party Parliamentary Group on Menopause and a passionate advocate about changing the way we think and feel about menopause. Here are her thoughts on the menopause revolution:

I was many years into my menopause before I actually realised it. If I’d known sooner what I know now, I would have been more enthusiastic about life and looking for more ways of looking at ways to support myself and support other women. Instead I probably spent the last ten years working, doing okay, but being very tired and having to push myself. I’ve missed out on a lot of life. I don’t want any other woman to go through that. Life is short and sweet.

So many of us think we’re alone in this journey

When I think back over last 12 years, I thought I was having a nervous breakdown. I used to love going on holiday to places like Florida. But I found even the thought of going to the local park was too much. The prospect of packing, travelling, organising for a holiday… I couldn’t face it. I was too tired.

Something I put down to long hours and hard work. But since I embraced the menopause and accepted that I’ve been menopausal for many years, I made a proactive decision to go on HRT. I’ve had two holidays and feel like I’ve gained back my life. I want other women to understand they can gain back theirs, too. I’d like to think everyone has an opportunity to experience normality. We’re not asking for special treatment.

I often reflect on my own mother’s experience. She would never have even said the word menopause. But thinking back, there was a time in her life when she changed and she never really got better from that. She became quite confused, she wasn’t diagnosed with anything because she wouldn’t go to the doctor. She’d say ‘I’ve got all my teeth and I can touch my toes so I’m fine’. But I know she wasn’t.

It’s so important to me that everyone lives as much of life as they possibly can and enjoys it. Unfortunately some women experiencing menopause are not getting the right services and support, someone to tell them they’re not going mad.

Menopause affects everyone

I’m so often thanked by men whose wives have seen and heard me talking about menopause and realised it was affecting them. Also when I’m out shopping, people have come up to me as they’ve seen me on TV advocating for menopause support. I love it. The message is getting through, women are talking about something that affects them, men are talking about something that affects them.

These are conversations that matter

People have been whispering about ‘the change’ for years but nobody has been talking about menopause. Thankfully we’re now in a much better place. Workwise, it’s a win-win situation, for colleagues and for business.

Many women are doing hard physical work. And they don’t have the choice to do anything but that work. They might not have the qualifications or opportunities, or the hours might suit their home life. That’s when things become exhausting and demanding. There are little things that could make their lives more bearable.

We know one in ten women leave work because of menopause. That’s one in ten who had an income who now don’t have an income. How do they survive, have they ended up on benefits, how much has their life changed? If they couldn’t afford to have a menopause when they were in work they certainly can’t when they’re out of work.

If you leave work it’s hard to get back in. Plus it can have a long-term effect, financially and socially. Work is part of your self esteem, routines, interactions, confidence.

Menopause support should be available to everyone

Far too many doctors don’t understand the menopause, or are afraid to prescribe for it. 41% of medical schools have no mandatory training on menopause. So that number are churning out GPs who have never discussed the menopause, something that affects 51% of the population on a personal level and 100% of the population on an extended level.

So women feel they have to go private, which not everyone can afford, so they get into debt. It’s really frustrating. Even herbal products can be expensive.

Women should be able to go into their GP’s surgery and say I know I’m menopausal, what support is available for me? I don’t blame the doctors but I blame the system.

My dream would be for every GP cluster to have somebody able to prescribe HRT if that’s what the woman wants, to identify that she’s menopausal and give her encouragement and information to do what she thinks is best. For it to be normal for every doctor’s surgery to have access to someone who can do that. And that all employers get it so people don’t even have to think about leaving work.

My passion is to help women not just in this country but all over the world. Globally, the UK is seen as brilliant because we’re talking about it.

And is showing real benefits, for individuals, for our relationships, in the workplace. This is the way it should be.

Deborah Garlick

Deborah is passionate about helping women live better lives by educating on the facts about menopause. She’s the CEO at Henpicked: Menopause in the Workplace and author of Menopause: the change for the better. And also founder of Henpicked.net.